• I’m 34 years old, and I may or may not have let gaming take over my life. You see, I worked the night shift at a hotel running the audit. The audit was fairly easy once you got the routine down and I never had to deal much with guests thankfully. I was, am a bit of a recluse.
• Then I moved to take a position to improve my career - only it's in a state where gambling will wreck your life. We've made friends here, we still do weekend adventures, I have a gym membership and I have a couple workout buddies, but gambling has consumed me to the point that I am so tired, worn out and stressed from trying to figure out how.
• I've ruined my life. I am 53 and have ruined my life. Been through several different theapists over the years without success. I used to be a Casino binge gambler. Never really lost money there but lost hours,days, weeks and months of time there. I have had that under control for years.

Gambling Awareness Program @ProgramGAP 'Mental illness and gambling are not separate conditions to treat individually; they’re all intertwined. What we’ve seen with COVID is people using gambling to soothe stress or to get away.' - aka, gambling is often used as a coping mechanism. However, if your gambling addiction has taken over your life and put you or others in danger, inpatient treatment may be necessary. Medication for Gambling Addiction Medications like naltrexone work on the reward system mentioned earlier. They reduce the amount of dopamine produced and released in your brain.

• This topic has 4 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 2 years ago by .

• Hi this is the first time I have posted on such a forum not really sure what has compelled me to on this occasion but here I am. Really I’m hoping someone has an answer or a solution to help

  me regain control over my gambling and my life as over the past six months has really spiralled downwards as a result of gambling and I think I’m only just coming to terms with the severity of it all.

  I’m 22 years old, failed to finish uni, completly destroyed my credit rating, and lost the respect of almost everyone I know all as a result of gambling. I have been gambling since I was 16

  casually sports betting and began playing poker all the time after I moved to uni this became somewhat of an obsession and you could find me either online or in a casino 6 or 7 nights a

  week somehow I managed to sustain this lifestyle for 2 or 3 years however I didn’t finish my degree and have been left with no meaningful qualifications and a ridiculous amount of student

  debt aswell as credit cards loans and money borrowed from friends and family.

  Whilst constantly playing poker I developed a Blackjack habit which has cost me tens of thousands of pounds over the past couple of years playing anywhere from £5 to £1000 a box and has really kick

  started the cycle of compulsive gambling for me. It got to a stage where my entire lifestyle and way of living was being determined by the flip of a card its that feeling that I buzzed of

  the sense of ‘I’m in a real mess if this goes wrong’ but even during this chaos I managed to maintain somewhat of a normal lifestyle, kept well presented and maintained a decent standard of living the majority

  of the time.

  However just under a year ago I went on a real hotstreak and seemingly couldnt lose playing poker,blackjack,roullette for around 2 months and went from having a swinging £1k-£3k ‘bankroll’ to having £25k in cash thinking I had finally cracked the gambling code however it just added fuel to the fire and my levels of gambling escalated dramatically what would’ve been a -£200 day became a -£4k day the emotional and financial stress of this

  has really led to me losing touch with reality and becoming isolated from alot of friends and family, many who had no idea the amounts of money I was winning and losing on a daily basis. Inevitably

  it took around 3 months for me to lose the money I had made and left me in a real emotional and finiancial mess and constantly thinking about what could’ve been.

  Since this rollercoaster I moved back to my hometown and have rented a flat and got a regular job in the hope of returning to normality but this hasn’t happened and I found myself gambling everything I possibly can

  have got on virtual casino games,slots, in the bookies conciously knowing I’m going to lose whatever money I have. Its got to the point where I don’t recognize my own thought processes and am aware that from

  a 3rd person perspective what I am doing is insane but I just can’t seem to stop for more than a day or two. The second I get any money my first thought is where/how/when can I go and gamble.

  The situation has really got out of control and I’ve known for a while that this cannot continue but every losing session I dig the hole deeper and deeper. I am fed up with contantly lying to everyone as to why I’m skint

  or what I need to borrow money for etc etc. I really feel that I need to curb this now before it goes any further, gambling has been such a big part of my life its the void thats left when I attempt to stop

  thats hard to fill I hardly know what to do with myself aswell as the sense of shame and guilt and self loathing that this has caused which is immense.

  I have tried to stop gambling many times, self exclusions, no debit cards etc. etc. however I always seem to find a way around these self imposed blocks the ingenuity of a gambling addict is something

  to be desired and I often feel if I could direct all this effort into something more productive I could really achieve something and attain a decent standard of living but all other plans fall second to gambling

  at the minute which is really demoralising and why I have spent an hour typing out all of this.

  I also realise despite feeling so isolated that what I’m going through isn’t unique and that thousands of people have there own ‘journey into gambling’ which they have strugled to overcome maybe communicating with

  people who actually understand gambling addiction first hand will help me in curbing this nasty habit.

  Thanks to anyone who spent time reading all this and if anyone out there has any advice or guidance it will be much appreciated because I cannot continue like this.

  Hi Abacus! The good news is you are young and time to turn your life around. I remember when I was your age and now I and thought I was inviencible. I won a lot. Worst thing that could ever happen. Now I am 47 and I can tell you it will never get better just worse and worse. I hope you get the help you need. Do they have celebrate recovery meetings where you live?? Maybe try that, a Counslor, giving up control of money?? Do what ever you have to do so you can have a better life. You have time to make this a distant memory. Your in my thoughts and prayers.

  Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

  Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

  Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

  As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

  And on that note….

  I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

  Take care

  The Gambling Therapy Team

  PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

  Having had the rollercoaster of the big wins and the subsequent losses, you know that gambling does not work for you and that you have a problem. Own it. Like the alcoholic who HAS to stop drinking you are a compulsive gambler who HAS to stop. Time and money is what you needto gamble with so try and eliminate both. Put the time into your recovery – self help groups – spending time on here – getting counselling or co-counselling if it is available in your area. As Jen3 has said – can you get someone else to be in charge of your money? Perhaps a family member who knows you have a problem. I think it is important for you to pick up your studies again in some way. See if you can get Careers Advice – you might be able to approach your old university for this. Could you use an on-line university like the OU in the UK or check out Future Learn on the web for short (and importantly free) courses in a wide range of subjects. Spending time on this will not only make you feel better about yourself but will give you less time for gambling. Take good care of yourself!

  Hello Abacus! It’s been a long since your first message! how are you coping with your CG problem?

  I guess you come from an anglosaxon country, hence the “failed to finish Uni” stuff. You cannot give exams to enrol to another University? You have to pay for tuition fees? That’s really crazy, but again, maybe it makes people more productive. They wanna bring this stuff to my country as well but I hope not, cause I am a law student on my 35s (third university I am finishing).

  Anyway, to the point. I am so happy , seeing people at your age talking about their problem here. I mean, you have the best chances right now. DO NOT miss them! Keep up with your daily job, no matter how much you like it or not. And when you come home, try and learn new stuff.

  There is nothing more exciting than gaining your dreams the hard way. This happiness lasts for a very long time, in contrast to gambling rush. I dont wanna promote any websites here, but theere are so many out there that can teach you anything! Be it Computer Science, Programming, Design, Cooking, anything! The next money you make, use it for a great online course instead of online gambling.

  Grab your hot (or cold, depending where you live) Chocolate/ coffee and put on your favorite music and enjoy every last moment of you, being 22 and filling your wonderful brain with new knowledge!

  I am not a psychologist. I don’t know about souls. I believe that you see and live what your brain is occupied of. Your brain is full of gambling. That’s why you gamble so much maybe. Try to start bringing in new knowledge and colors. And day by day, this new knowledge will kick the old dirty gambling knowledge away. There is no such a thing as a Gambling Professor. Only a professor in Law, Physics, History, Math, IT.

  That’s the life you deserve. They life you need. They life you CAN have. And you need to have it ASAP! Come back to us soon and tell us your experiences! Wishing you the best!

• Taking Back Control of Your Life

In my studies I have found that many people who experience psychiatric symptoms or have had traumatic things happen to them feel that they have no power or control over their own lives. Control of your life may have been taken over when your symptoms were severe and you were in a very vulnerable position. Family members, friends and health care professionals may have made decisions and taken action in your behalf because your symptoms were so intrusive you couldn’t make decisions for yourself, they thought you wouldn’t make good decisions or they didn’t like the decisions you made. Even when you are doing much better, others may continue making decisions in your behalf. Often, the decisions that are made for you and the resulting action are not those you would have chosen.

Taking back control of your life by making your own decisions and your own choices is essential to recovery. It will help you to feel better about yourself and may even help you to relieve some of the symptoms that have been troubling to you.

Gambling Has Taken Over My Life

There are several things you can do to begin this process. You can do these things in whatever way feels right to you. You may want use a journal to list or write your thoughts and ideas as a way to stay focused on what it is you want, to motivate yourself and to record your progress.

1.Think about what you really want your life to be like.
Do you want to:

• go back to school and study something of special interest to you?
• enhance your talents in some way?
• travel?
• to do a certain kind of work?
• have a different home space or to own your home?
• move to the country or the city?
• have an intimate partner?
• have children?
• work with an alternative health care provider on wellness strategies?
• make your own decisions about treatment?
• stop putting up with disabling side effects?
• become more physically active?
• lose or gain weight?

You can probably think of many more ideas. Write them all down. You may want to keep them in a journal.

Gambling Took Over My Life

2.List those things that have kept you from doing the things you wanted to do in the past. Perhaps it has been lack of money or education. Maybe your symptoms have been too severe. Maybe your treatment makes you lethargic and “spacey”. Maybe someone in your life insists on making your decisions for you.

Then write down ways you could work on resolving each of the problems that keep you from doing the things you want to do and being the kind of person you want to be. As you do this, remind yourself that you are a intelligent person. You may have been told that you are not intelligent because you have a “mental illness”. Experiencing psychiatric symptoms does not meant that your intelligence is limited in any way. You have the ability to find ways to resolve problems and to work on resolving them. You can resolve these problems slowly or quickly. You can take small steps or big steps — whatever feels right and is possible for you. But you must do it if you want to take back control of your life.

In the process of taking control of your own life, you may need to change the nature of your relationship with some of the people in your life. For instance, instead of your doctor telling you what to do, you and your doctor would talk about your options and you would choose the ones that felt best to you. You may need to tell a parent or spouse that you will make your own decisions about where you will live, what you will do and who you will associate with. You may have to tell a sibling who has been overprotective that you can take care of yourself now.

3.Know your rights and insist that others respect these rights. If your rights are not respected, contact your state agency of protection and advocacy (every state has one — you can find it under the state listings in your phone book or by calling the office of the governor).

Your rights include the following:

• I have the right to ask for what I want.
• I have the right to say no to requests or demands I can’t meet.
• I have the right to change my mind.
• I have the right to make mistakes and not have to be perfect.
• I have the right to follow my own values and standards.
• I have the right to express all of my feelings, both positive or negative.
• I have the right to say no to anything when I feel I am not ready, it is unsafe, or it violates my values.
• I have the right to determine my own priorities.
• I have the right not to be responsible for others’ behavior, actions, feelings or problems.
• I have the right to expect honesty from others.
• I have the right to be angry.
• I have the right to be uniquely myself.
• I have the right to feel scared and say “I’m afraid.”
• I have the right to say “I don’t know.”
• I have the right not to give excuses or reasons for my behavior.
• I have the right to make decisions based on my feelings.
• I have the right to my own needs for personal space and time.
• I have the right to be playful and frivolous.
• I have the right to be healthy.
• I have the right to be in a non-abusive environment.
• I have the right to make friends and be comfortable around people.
• I have the right to change and grow.
• I have the right to have my needs and wants respected by others.
• I have the right to be treated with dignity and respect.
• I have the right to be happy.

These rights have been adapted from The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Eugene Bourne (Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 1995).

4.Educate yourself so that you have all the information you need to make good decisions and to take back control of your life. Study resource books. Check out the internet. Ask people whom you trust. Make your own decisions about what feels right to you and what doesn’t.

5.Plan your strategies for making your life the way you want it to be. Figure out the best way for you to get what it is that you want or to be the way you want to be. Then start working at it. Keep at it with courage and persistence until you have reached your goal and made a dream come true.

A Possible First Step

One timely way you could choose to begin the process of taking back control of your life is to get involved in the upcoming election. You could begin by thinking about and listing the political issues that are most important to you. They may include things like mental and physical health care, the cost of medications, disability benefits, housing, human services, social justice, the environment, education and employment. Jot down some notes about action you would like to see your community, state or the federal government take in regard to these issues. Then study the candidates. Find out which candidates most closely support your view on these issues and will best be able to create favorable change. Then register before November so you can VOTE for that person or those people.

In addition, if you feel ready, you could become further involved if you choose to by:

• contacting groups that are concerned with the issues that you care about — ask them for information, volunteer to assist them in their efforts.
• talking to family members, friends, neighbors and co-workers about your views and the candidates you support – -encouraging them to vote for the candidates you prefer.
• letting others know about your preferences through bumper stickers, campaign buttons and lawn signs.
• writing a letter to the editor of your newspaper to share your views or calling in on radio talk shows.
• volunteering to work at the polls, or to work for a particular candidate.

Whether your candidates win or lose, you will know you did the best you could and that through your efforts more people are now informed about the issues. You may even decide that you want to run for office.

Printed by permission of: The Mental Health American, Fall 2000

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